Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
