My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
Randomize
