? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Randomize
