I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
Randomize
