it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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