I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
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