Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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