is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
