dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Randomize
