Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize
