Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
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