Slut skills are useful in every country.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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