The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
Randomize
