life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
Randomize
