we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
My legs feel like baby dolphins
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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