I showed him my bush... on skype.
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Randomize