I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Randomize
