Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
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