ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
