He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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