that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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