I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
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