How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
Randomize