Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
