i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
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