You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
Small penises have feelings too.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
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