did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
