I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
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