So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
