if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
