Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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