we have officially mastered the walk of shame
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
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