just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize
