So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Randomize
