i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
so let's talk penis.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
Randomize