What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Randomize
