Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
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