it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
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