i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
Randomize