Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
Randomize
