at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
Dude, seriously, fucking stop introducing me as "Thomas, with the dick piercing." you are the worst wingman ever.
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
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