ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
Randomize
