You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
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