His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
Randomize
