I think scott just propositioned me for sex
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
