if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
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