The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
It's rum buckets o'clock
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
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