WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
The power of my boobs compel you
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
Randomize
