He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
Randomize
