girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
