The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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